What to Wear?

There's something inside of me that wants everything to be perfect right now... Like if I think of it, it should become what I want it to be the minute I think of it. Whether it's a clean house, a craft project, a lesson plan, I want it right then & there, and done to perfection.

Sadly, there's another part of me in constant battle with the first part.  This other part knows that perfection cannot be met. This part of me gets overwhelmed with all the ideas that cannot be finished. This part of me often paralyzes me, keeping me from getting anything done.

I feel that no one understands this part of me. They must see it as laziness, flakiness, unreliability.  So already bathed in the fears of imperfection and incompletion, I cover myself with a layer of guilt and the worry that I'm not enough-- that I can't measure up. Then to top it all off I dress up in bitterness accessorized by a sharp tongue. I do not feel good in this outfit & it makes my loved ones miserable.

Why is it that no matter how much I plan or how hard I work, something always seems to be left undone? Time is always running out, and I always feel guilty about something that I didn't do?

Is it just me? Is it a mama thing? A woman thing?

I wonder if I'm the only one. Do the ladies I know, who appear to have it all together, in truth wrestle with the same troubles? 

I don't know but I don't think God wants me to live this way. I know in my heart that His wish for me is that I'd break free from this binding uncomfortable outfit, that I'd unravel this cloak of fear and guilt. My Father wishes that I'd do what His word says in Colossians 3, clothe myself "with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience," and over it all to "put on love".

I know what He wants, yet even though I try to do His will, I can't seem to shake free from my chains of doubt, weariness, and just down-right stubbornness. Anybody else feel like this?

Times like these, when I'm feeling used up & not enough, I need these words from Psalm 34:5, "Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame." It means everything to know that if I keep my eyes on the Lord, I will be alright. Or when I just don't want to do anything because I know I can't finish, I am motivated to keep moving by these words from Galatians 6:9, "Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." 

What are you planting?

Have you heard this age-old wisdom?  It's pretty cut & dry.  Whatever you plant, you reap.  Funny how this theme is growing in my life lately.  
My classroom decor is all about plants and seeds and growing.  I really can't explain how that took root, but what started as the seed of an idea has grown

into the decorative theme of my walls, doors, and nick-nacks.  
I have searched out quotes to fit the theme, painted a lovely tree on my wall, made flowers and seed packs and the like.  All of the prep has been pretty inspiring to say the least.
In the midst of this I started reading a book by Dani Johnson-- First Steps to Wealth.  And what to my searching mind would appear but the chapter entitled "The Law of  Reaping and Sowing".  Again this theme comes the surface of the earth.
Hmmm.  What's going on here?
My guess is that God is teaching me that I need to be more mindful of what I am planting into the garden of my life and the lives of others.  What will grow from the seeds I scatter?  
It's really pretty simple.  If I plant encouragement, I will receive it.  If I plant honor & love, that's what I will have as well.  Not only that, but when I plant JOY  in the heart of my child or WISDOM in the hearts of my students, they will pass it on to others.  I have seen this happen.  The LAW proves itself over & over again.  You can't plant beans and expect strawberries, but if you plant strawberries in good fertile soil, someone will have strawberries to eat.  
So today, let's keep in this mind.  What you throw out may take root.  Will you plant love? hope? confidence? peace? hard work? Or will you plant weeds of negativity and despair? Be ever mindful. For the law of sowing and reaping is universal. What are you planting?

SET GOALS & PRIORITIES

I have posted this before because it's a piece of encouragement that's a big part of my life... or at least it should be. 

A long time ago I set up this acrostic for myself to remind me of my purpose in life... To let my light shine. I SHINE because I am the light of the world according to Jesus in Matthew 5. In Proverbs 13:9 we are reminded that "the light of the righteous shines brightly..." My little poetic reminder just gives me guidance as to what I believe in my heart I should be doing to let my little light shine. 

The S stands for setting goals. The Bible tells us that "Where there is no vision the people parish." Proverbs 29:18. This was the motto of my home church where I grew up; so it's burned on my soul like a brand. I sure don't want to parish. I need to know where I am going each day. So I make a list... Not too long.  There are about a million other things I'd like to get done, but I know better than to let myself be overwhelmed.  If you are like me (one who gets distracted or overwhelmed easily), then you should keep your list short too. Prioritize. What HAS to be done today?  What CAN you successfully accomplish? Put those on your SHINE list. Remember: "The plans of the diligent lead to profit as sure as haste leads to poverty." Proverbs 21:5

The Breath I Take

The Breath I Take

Trying Something New: Animoto

It's Music Monday at our place, so I've been trying out a new app called Animoto and built this little video for the Oldest Town in Texas Roadshow.  Click the link to see what I've been up to.  and keep your eyes and ears open for that new music I promised. Grace to you from the Red Dirt :)

Walk Reflection: Remember Who You Are

I have not "arrived" even though I dream of "having it all together". I am so imperfect, so flawed, and fallible. And boy oh boy, sometimes everyone & everything around me seem all too happy to keep me in check. Everywhere I turn I am reminded that I'm not good enough to meet all this world's expectations. Sometimes even little voices from the past shout inside my head to remind me how I messed up 2 weeks ago or 2 years ago or even 12 years ago. It can be painful. 

BUT there's also a voice inside my heart that reminds me who I am. 

Here's what it tells me... Who I am in Christ is not determined by how I feel nor by what any human thinks of me. 

Who I am in Christ was determined by grace almost 2000 years before I was born. 

Guilt can't change it. Inadequacy can't change it. Moments of dumbfounded stupidity can't change it. 

Another human being can in NO WAY change my Lord's brilliant love for me. 

If you know Christ, it's the same for you. 

We are called according to His holy purpose.  When God saves you it's so He can have fellowship with you because He loves you so much. He will put you to work & you may be successful, or you may fail. Just like any parent who gives his or her child a chance to try something, God will guide you gently with His Word, applaud when it works out, or dust you off when you fall, & teach you something from your scars. See Romans 8:28.

God won't just change your circumstances, He will change your life. The trials for today will become lessons & victory tomorrow, but nothing will separate you from His love or His purpose for you. 

So keep on Shining! And I will too. GRACE & peace from the RED DIRT of East Texas. See ya Monday with some new Music. 

Hello-o-o-o SUMMER!!

   Summer has landed here in East Texas with the last day of school yesterday. YES!!! SUMMER!

   Grades were in. Room was packed up into my closet so it could get cleaned. And even though some of my coworkers were depressed about their empty rooms and blank walls, I was not.

    Why? I see a blank canvas, new possibilities... It really fires me up!

   So this morning, first Saturday of the summer, I was up at 4am, getting things done... Dishes. Laundry. Beds. Super healthy breakfast. Plans. Lists. This. That. And I'm still going, hoping not to crash & praying God will guide me to use my summer days wisely.
  One priority I have is to be more consistent with blogging. I don't have a big following yet, but I never will if I don't go anywhere.
  My goal is to bring you NEW MUSIC from RockingP, a little bit about FITNESS, a little bit about FOOD from a busy mom's kitchen, a little bit about FASHION & TEACHING a little bit about the GRACE of our LORD JESUS, & hopefully a little INSPIRATION. I sure hope you click, like, & feel inspired enough to share. 

  Summer smiles from the RED DIRT of East Texas. Stay cool. I'll see y'all tomorrow with a little Sunday SUNSHINE.  :)